5 Ways to Be More Patient and Less Annoyed

This week, Savvy Psychologist Dr. Ellen Hendriksen offers up 5 ways to fatten up our quickly-thinning patience

Join Our Community of Science Lovers!

Paul from Australia wrote in and asked how he could cultivate his patience. Paul is visually impaired and often gets questions or offers of help from strangers. At first, the questions were welcome conversation starters and the offers of help were charming. But after years and years, as you might imagine, it’s all started to get annoying. Oblivious questions, miss-the-mark offers of help, and awkwardly alarmist people create interpersonal tension that Paul is left to deal with. So he asks, how can I be more patient? How can I be less annoyed when these people are just curious or trying to help?

Now, Paul’s question applies to all of us. We all have that thing that annoys us. We all have the pet peeve to which we’re super-sensitive. And when it happens, we overreact—we might yell, get sarcastic, roll our eyes, or use a contemptuous tone of voice, none of which are helpful and all of which make things worse.

On supporting science journalism

If you're enjoying this article, consider supporting our award-winning journalism by subscribing. By purchasing a subscription you are helping to ensure the future of impactful stories about the discoveries and ideas shaping our world today.

For me, it’s my kids yelling, “Mommy, come here quick!” I think I’m responding to crisis, only to have them ask for more peanut butter pretzels. Which, I might add, they could have easily gotten for themselves.

For you, it might be your partner leaving hair in the drain, your kids nightly bedtime delay tactics, that spinning beach ball on your computer, your co-worker’s donkey-meets-a-car-horn laugh, or pretty much any aspect of your commute. (Some days on my train, I suspect it would be faster to drag myself home with my lips).

So why do we get so annoyed at such objectively little things? The answer is called sensitization. You heard of tolerance—gradually getting used to higher and higher levels of alcohol, drugs, kid messes, what have you. Sensitization is the opposite of tolerance.

»Continue reading “5 Ways to Be More Patient and Less Annoyed ” on QuickAndDirtyTips.com

Subscribe to Support Independent Journalism

Great science journalism requires human expertise, time, effort and creativity. And it costs money. That’s why I and the journalists here at Scientific American hope you’ll join our community.

When you subscribe, you are supporting staff and freelance journalists who are passionate about telling science stories that are true, important and compelling. Our editors and reporters are often experts in their fields, which means they understand the nuances of big discoveries and can untangle the breakthroughs from the hype. With a subscription, you are also supporting rigorous fact-checking to ensure the words we publish are precise and accurate. And you’re supporting original illustrations, graphics and photos that bring you closer to an advanced laboratory, an ice sheet in Antarctica or a space mission in orbit. You’re helping us craft other types of high-quality journalism as well: Our newsletters are carefully written, edited and curated by staffers you have or will come to know and love. Our Science Quickly podcast is based on original reporting, collaboration with editors and scientists and exacting production.

Subscriptions keep this engine running so we can continue to deliver thoughtful, rigorous and independent science journalism to you. In an era of viral misinformation, this work is crucial. If you value what we do, I hope you’ll consider joining us as a subscriber

Thank you,

Jeanna Bryner, Editor in Chief, Scientific American